July 18, 2007

We Are Not Pregnant, Part Deux

In the aforementioned conversation about sympathetic male pregnancy, or a similar one at another time, I cannot precisely remember, I came up with an idea, which my friend, H, promised to illustrate. Here, just in time to supplement yesterday's post, is H's fine handiwork. Make sure you look at them in order. There is this and then this.

Brilliant. Thanks, H, for that lovely execution.

P.S. Here is the Dassler edit of that last drawing. And remember, gents, if you ever find yourself at the business end of that particular scalpel, don't try to be macho or cheap out and think you can recover without the aid a of jock (or "athletic supporter," if you will, which is a funny name isn't it, because it rather sounds like that would be a member of the booster club or something), because you can't, and it ain't pretty. Or so I've heard. There's a reason God let the women have the babies, because we're pretty much wusses when it comes to pain. Which reminds me of best practical joke that I thought of but didn't execute. When, er, shall we say, someone close to me had this procedure done, I really wanted to stop by Walmart and bring him a cap gun so that, in the short run, at least he would have something he could get up, and then also he could get used to, you know, only shooting blanks. I did tell about this intended gift, but somehow he didn't think it very funny.

Apologies for that PG-13 moment on an otherwise PG blog.

Posted by jackdas at 8:42 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

June 10, 2007

t(ie)pology

This page will be updated in batches as I wear them and think to take the pictures. It may take some time (it is a big collection). If the name is blank, it means I have not as yet thought up one. Here, in no particular order, is the Dassler t(ie)pology. Click on the thumnails if you prefer a bigger image.

There is a lot of polyester here, but I like how they look and they are low maintenance. You have to be more gentle with silk ties to get stuff off of them. I do like the feel of the silk though. Oh, and just so you know, just because I do pay a fair amount attention to my tie choices and matching them with shirts, I still must insist that, no, I do not wear outfits.

Oh, and tie tying style? Full Windsor all the way, baby! Love that symmetry. If you are worried about fat knots, keep pulling down as you tie it. As far as I'm concerned, you only need another knot if you are tying a skinny leather tie from the eighties, any skinny tie from the eighties, for that matter.

Cohort I

Name: Razzle Dazzle I
Brand: n/a
Origin: thrift store
Material: polyester
Comment: OK, so its a bit flashy, I know, but with the equally bold shirt, I can manage to pull it off.

Name:
Brand: 615 Collection
Origin: thrift store
Material: polyester
Comment: I really feel bad for this tie, as I do not think it has ever gotten commented upon. Perhaps it is because it is rather somber and serious. But it has a lovely shade of red in it and shiny, navy blue. Perhaps I need to do better by it and wear a shirt that makes its strengths shine.

Name: Red Paisley
Brand: n/a
Origin: gift / thrift store
Material: Ancient Madder, All Silk
Comment: Ah, this was one of my favorites at one point. Alas, it has begun to fray on one side, so it does not get nearly the circulation it deserves anymore. And this is not a fantastic pic of it.

Name: The All-time Favorite / Interview Tie
Brand: Regalon (Wash and Wear)
Origin: gift / thrift store
Material: 100% Polyester
Comment: Oh, I do love this tie, its color and pattern. It matches a lot of the colors I like i.e. the family of brown, which I have been pretty much inhabiting over the past 5 years or so. Oh, and gotta love a wash and wear tie.

Name:
Brand: n/a
Origin: thrift store
Material: 65% Acetate, 35% Rayon (yes, I think that makes it 100 % Polyester as well)
Comment: The patterns on this ties are intricate, yet subtle. You only catch them in good light. These polyester ties are amazingly textured. Not sure how they do that, but I like it

Name: The Power Tie, Slumming with Hipsters
Brand: Jones New York
Origin: thrift store
Material: 100% Silk
Comment: OK, so this tie is a bit out of place here, but the red is of deep and melancholy enough quality and it has a very nice slate stripe, so I let it in. It is amazing the brand names you can buy at a thrift store

Name: Midnight with Chagall Blue
Brand:
Origin: thrift store
Material: n/a but it seems like Polyester again
Comment: OK, so the name is a bit pretentious, but that is what it looks like. This picture doesn't do it justice.

Name: The New Regalon
Brand: Regalon
Origin: thrift store
Material: 100% Polyester
Comment: This, along with "The Power Tie, Slumming with the Hipsters," were my most recent purchases. Now I need to get a shirt to do it justice.

Name: Nerve Cells with Stained Nuclei
Brand: n/a
Origin: Gift from Lydia
Material: 100% Polyester
Comment: Lydia was my direct supervisor at SIUE and a bit of a mother to me for a while. This tie is polyester, but it feels like silk


Name: Just Making the Cut
Brand: Polo by Ralph Lauren
Origin: thrift store
Material: Polyester
Comment: I gotta tell you, I am rather ambivalent about this tie, but the burgundy and green in it goes well with a shirt and my only summer suit coat that fits just now.

Posted by jackdas at 7:49 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

May 23, 2007

Tea, Glorious Tea!

See, now when I suggest a cup of tea after, say, house church or a P.L.A.T.E.S(S) lunch or....OK, pretty much after anything...it will be perceived as an imminently healthy suggestion. Of course the article doesn't address the adverse effects that the sugar and milk might have in a cup of tea the way I like it. Oh, and do you have a favorite tea? Favorite tea ritual?

My favorite tea is straight up black (orange pekoe and cut black) tea with milk and sugar, and unless you are in India or Pakistan, the milk should be evaporated milk or half in half to get the real flavor. Oh, and make the tea strong. I also like Moroccan Mint with sugar. Green tea with honey is nice as well. For a change up, I like a cup of Lapsang Souchong, which Jesse says is like drinking a campfire. Plus, it is fun to pronounce. And, though, I do not consider herbal teas to be be tea, a cup of Sweet Dreams takes me, very pleasantly, right back to Cedar Campus where I first drank it.

Favorite tea ritual? Well, I do enjoy a cup of tea on my own on a quiet morning or in the car on the way to work, but the most delightful times are with others. In high school, we would walk to the local village to have tea on a ricketty balcony overlooking a massive valley in the foothills of the Himalayas. Now, a nice shared cup after house church or on a Sunday evening is equally lovely. And then there was (note the past tense) tea time with Jesse, where one or the other of us would make the tea and either sit on the balcony and talk or sit laptop to laptop and work (OK, its probably more often simply playing) and talk. That was until he up and moved away
:(

;)

Posted by jackdas at 9:57 AM | Comments (10) | TrackBack

May 10, 2007

Processional

Last night, in a delightful, post-house church, coffee shop gathering, sitting outside in the lovely night, we were playing "Would You Rather," a game involving someone asking a question such as "Needing to raise money, say, for seminary for example, would you rather spend a year working in the Reptile House at the St. Louis Zoo, cleaning cages, moving reptiles etc. or spend a year constantly making funnel cakes as a carnival worker?" The person who asked the question would then have to go around and guess how each person would answer. Pretty cool game.

Here are a selection of some of the other questions. Sorry, I cannot remember them all just now.

"Would you rather spend a month long vacaation in Italy or Brazil?"

"Would you rather have two children or five?"

"Would you rather take an art class or literature class (either studying each genre or practising it)?"

"Would you rather lose your sight or your hearing for the rest of your life?"

"Would you rather be married in a stone church or outside?"

This final question elicited some wedding ceremony related discussion, ranging from unity candle symbolism (Yes, Dawn, I mentioned my poo poo-ing the floating unity candle :) to what hymn/chorus/song folks might want to include in their wedding ceremonies.

Well, selecting music for my morning commute reminded me of the song I want for a processional...for the guys that is. You gotta love a pair of nationalistic, nerdy looking, Scottish, identical twins who love the blues, sing in their own accents, and engage in religious reflection from time to time.

Oh...funnel cake, Italy, five, literature, lose my sight (though I later changed it to hearing), and stone church (though I wouldn't be picky).

Posted by jackdas at 3:06 PM | Comments (12) | TrackBack

April 10, 2007

Long Delayed

Here are two events which I fully intended to blog about, but somehow never managed to get to.

Running with the Devil

Today I managed to get back to running after nearly a two week hiatus. It was quite difficult, as usual, but the endorphins sure do feel good now. I think I burned out for a couple of weeks because: a) I always do after a few days/weeks/months of good effort, and b) I think I was rather pushing myself pretty hard before a 5k I did with friends on March 24th.

I arrived at the 5k site in Tower Grove park, which was not quite as flat as I remembered whilst driving through it (memory of the hills on a route is so subjective depending on whether you are driving a car, riding a bike, or running), to discover the number that I had been assigned was....Well, you can see it in the picture below. I said to the woman rather lightly that that was a rather inauspicious number. She asked if I wanted a different one, but I said that it wasn't a problem and that I would go ahead and wear the Mark-o-the-Beast.

Now, if you are a brother or a close friend, you may be sniggering right about now because you remember my phobia when I was growing up that I was predestined to grow up be the Anti-Christ and my obessive fear of the number "6." Oh, go ahead and laugh. It's funny. Not so much when I was kid though. You can't be too careful what sort of movies you let your kids see. A combination of obsessive compulsive tendencies (yeah, ask me about it) combined with, I am sure, a well-meant, but terrifying viewing, of The Thief in the Night at boarding school, combined with perhaps some genuine spiritual oppression, and, well, you have one fearful child. But, seriously, if you ever see me amassing large amounts of political power, I think you know what you should do.

Getting back to the race though, evidently the number didn't help my manners. Here's me running off-course, past some nice ladies who were walking the course. What can I say, the Devil made me do it. In the background you can just see Claire, of Reason's Why fame, and to the left Joel Chappeau and Dave Lim.

Dave was not running officially but came to spur us on to love and good works. As for the race, well, having gone out a bit too fast, I had to walk for about twenty yards. Still, I managed what was for me a very respectable time of 29 minutes flat. Yeah, and then dehydration and burnout, but still it was worth it. And while I was gasping across the finish line, the woman who had registered me said:

"And the Devil finishes!"

Nice.

Not by Bread Alone

So, first a little background. On Sunday afternoons, oh about ever other week, a group of us from church gather for a potluck. Our group is called The Flying P.L.A.T.E.S(S) People Living Apart Together Eating Something (Sundays). I know, I know, but just go with it, OK? Actually, it is a wonderful time where we have good food and good conversations, which are interrupted with an official ice-breaker type question for everyone to answer, so that people will talk to one another. Go figure. Actually, the questions are fun and instructive too.

At any rate, I send out an Evite for each event and sometimes come up with the theme. The theme for April 1st was a barbecue, and since the meat was being provided, people were to bring sides, salads, desserts, etc. etc. Well, the aforementioned day arrived, and I hurriedly got to the house where we were eating and lit the fire and got things going, running in and out of the house like some type of Martha, of Bethany or Stewart fame, it doesn't matter. And people kept showing up with bread. And, I, totally obllivious, kept having them put it on the table. People were amused that everyone had brought bread and joked about it a bit. I did too (ha, ha) but inwardly was getting rather nervous at our carb-loaded and boring lunch. Here is the pile pointed out by none other than the author of Flakjammit.

Now, you think I would have realized. But, no. I ran in and out, outwardly laughing, inwardly getting a little flustered, whilst the schemers sat outside enjoying the lovely day and their devious little plan.

In my prayer, I even humorously thanked God for all the bread and then reminded myself to be thankful for all our blessings in any case. It was not until just as everyone lined up to eat and I stood host-and-Martha-like at the end of the table that they revealed their prank. Honestly, it took them telling me a couple of times to understand what had just happened, as folks went out to get their real dishes.

Nicely done.

And, then, if that were not enough, they knew just how to push my buttons further. I asked for ideas for a question from the table and some suggested, "Let's go around and each tell what is our favorite body part is on the opposite sex." And true to form, just as those who know my prudish and dictator-like (benign not malignant) tendencies had predicted, I interjected something like, "No, I don't think we should do that one." Joke part two. I heard that in the planning stages for the ruse, at a party the night before, there were some even spicier suggestions than this. But I will leave that to the co-conspirators to mention in their comments if they wish.

Groan. I am gullible. And here I thought I was so aware and sophisticated.

Posted by jackdas at 4:56 PM | Comments (8) | TrackBack

March 29, 2007

red

handed ::: headed (well, kind of)

Posted by jackdas at 1:23 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

March 23, 2007

Addendum

Upon seeing one of my latest pictures in Catapult, my boss insists that he sees a ram in the rock behind it, adding significance to the paschal theme of the picture. I am not seeing a ram, maybe a donkey or a horse or big horn sheep, kind of, but not a ram. Do you see anything? Because if you do, I am thinking dollar signs.

Other co-workers, too, sort of saw the ram, while one accused me of placing the leaf for dramatic effect. Ah, the temerity! I am hurt. If truth be known, though, I am so NOT beyond doing that, but this one was au naturale.

Posted by jackdas at 11:07 AM | Comments (5) | TrackBack

March 14, 2007

Mmm...Jelabis!

Sadly, the need to pay bribes is rampant in all of the Indian sub-continent, in both India and Pakistan. I am not entirely sure why. Low salaries are probably a major reason, but I suspect that there are also other underlying cultural reasons for it, ala Darrow Miller's analysis. Grind your teeth, if you must (you know who ya'll are ;).

No, the point of this post was not to begin a heady debate, though that of course is not precluded, as our little blog community does a better than average job of both going deep and keeping it civil. No, this post is to celebrate the fact that at least the next time you are getting shaken down in India, it may indeed be a more pleasant experience. Well, in Gujarat at least.

And, also, to help solve one of the problems mentioned in the article, the officers may want to lay off the jalebis and chai. OK, not the the chai. That would be cruel and unusual.

Posted by jackdas at 12:16 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

March 6, 2007

It Occurred to Me Whilst Driving Home...

...that I am going to have to recast my relationship with my camera. If he is Caspian, then no longer will the metaphor of spouse, permiscuous or otherwise, really work. I don't really want to be the Trumpkin to his Caspian, but I could stand to be a Drinian, a best friend who helps navigate Caspian's ship to distant lands and far off seas to search for wonder. For those interested in the next Narnia movie, you may be please to know that Peter Dinklage of The Station Agent fame has signed on to play Trumpkin. This is cool, even if I think they should not have made Prince Caspian and just gone onto The Voyage of the Dawn Treader.

And, now, my first picture with the camera is going to have to be completely reworked. I was going to do either an American Gothic sort of pose when Lucy came or some nonsense involving dressing up and a formal pose. Now it will have to be something completely different. I know you wait with baited breath.

So, does anyone else spend as much time planning entries for their blog. I don't actually do concerted planning, but occassionally ideas occur to me and I will spend a fair amount of mental energy fleshing them out. And in at least one case, the thing that was supposed to happen for a blog entry to work never did. I and I was very glad. I was just waiting for the St. Louis Cardinals to crash out of the postseason, and then do a blog entry called "And the cardinal hits the window," which is taken from Sufjan's Steven's Casimir Pulaski Day.

Posted by jackdas at 10:32 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

January 17, 2007

Unleashing My Inner Pakistani With a Little Bit of Soul

OK, so probably 95% of Pakistani men have a moustache, which they grow from whenever they can to the end of their lives . I generally avoid just a moustache alone because it makes me look older, unlike say my middle brother Adrian, for whom a moustache makes him look just kind of ruggedly handsome.

Pastor Adrian

Below, are photos of my moustache with a crazy little soul patch for good measure. Who knows how long it will survive, so here it is for blogsterity. My roommate Lloyd said it looked rather child molesterish. Child molesterish? Now I would have settled for Inigo Montoya or Zorro gone to seed, but child molesterish? Now, who looks really cool with this facial hair arrangement is Dr. Williams at Covenant Seminary, but he has the shaved head and toughness to back it up.

     

Posted by jackdas at 11:55 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

November 3, 2006

48 Hours of Birthday

There was a time when I became accustomed to celebrating birthdays for a week, with a little present given the celebratee each day. Nice. In the past two days, however, I have experienced more than a week's worth of celebrating, and it was brilliant.

On my actual birthday on Wednesday, in addition to sundry telephone calls and emails with birthday wishes, at work we had a cake and ice cream for me and a colleague who had her birthday a day earlier. And then during cake and ice cream my brother, sis, and their adorable children showed up with more sweets.

In the evening, Angela brought cobbler and ice cream (that was my choice) to house church. Very nice. And after, some of us hit Blueberry Hill, where we were joined by the boys.

Then Thursday began with breakfast at Bob Evans with my very loving father, which has become somewhat of a tradition.

Finally, last night after work we had an ever so nice gathering at what I think is my favorite pub, Dressel's. There were roommates and churchmates and new friends. Lots of cheer, chips with salt and vinegar and rarebit, and yes a rather largish number of libations. In fact, I am doing rather well today having survived my first Irish Carbomb. I am not very keen on slam-em-back drinks, but when it is your birthday and your roommates are keen on them and are being absolutely lovely to you, well, there is nothing for it put to slam it back. OK, so I wanted to as well. For details, click below. Yes, I was sober enough to drive home and make this wee diagram, though perhaps not sober enough to fully consider "Why am I diagramming a drink." It was yummy, but it does knock you back a bit.

After some lovely presents, including a CD of these folks, and much joyous banter, it was time to come home and bring my 48 hour birthday to an end.

Thank you so much to everyone who was a part of it. For lots of pictures of both pub nights, click on the picture below.

Posted by jackdas at 1:55 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

October 2, 2006

This smile brought to you by the Dassler Effect...

...because sometimes you just gotta!

*for happy bouncy soundtrack, click here.

Posted by jackdas at 4:58 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

September 29, 2006

Groan!!!

Posted by jackdas at 1:15 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

September 4, 2006

Random Thought of the Day

As a guy you know you are getting old when you have to trim those pesky nose hairs (not to mention the ones on your ears). And then it is confirmed when white hairs start to pepper your head. Ah, but today the ignominy of ageing was really driven home with several white nose hairs that need trimming! Groan!

Posted by jackdas at 1:40 AM | TrackBack

June 8, 2006

The Fighting Dasslers FC

Did you ever want to design your own football logo or name your own football team? Well, a cool site from Nike lets you do just that, though obviously it is not completely customizable. This site has lots of additional cool stuff, including JOGATV with a video of pepole passing a soccer ball along in a long chain made from user submitted videos.

Another interesting and inspiring soccer story is about Clint Dempsey. He is no preppie, pretty soccer boy of the sort that walked around in Nike sandals after games when I played high school soccer in the '80's. On the contrary, he's gots some street cred and freestyle skills. And I am not recommending that you buy his indoor soccer shoe (which looks kind of like a skate shoe) as it is $85, but it is fun to customize a pair. And here is a link to Clint "Deuce" Dempsey's web site, which has a blog and video clips, etc.

Finally, a strange and thought provoking story about soccer and sorcery (and an meditation on spiritual warfare) from another fellow NCF blogger, Kirk, husband of Sarah, father of Joanna.

Posted by jackdas at 6:15 PM | TrackBack

June 7, 2006

A Tale of Two Dasslers and World Cup Madness!

Today on BBC News, I came across the sad and somewhat humorous story of Rudi and Adi Dassler, brothers whose inability to get along led to the creation of two althetic shoe giants in the same little town in Germany and the dividing of the town along party lines. And since the story is fascinating and related to the title of the blog, I thought it worth posting.

Anyone going to watch the World Cup? If so, who are you going for. I am for America, first, but running a close second, if not on par with the US, the Anglophile in me wants to see England do well.

Posted by jackdas at 4:47 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

February 1, 2006

Funny Videos

I don't post a whole lot of these but....

...here is a funny video of two white men rapping about the getting ready to go see the Chronicles of Narnia and some pseudo-serious analysis from Slate magazine.

...and a funny video mash-up of the Lord of the Rings movies, which I was made aware of by Jeffrey Overstreet's excellent blog on movies.

Posted by jackdas at 4:53 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

September 30, 2005

He's Got Legs

For the past three years over the summer I have vigorously trained in order to get in shape for the MS 150, whilst pestering my friends and family for donations. Here is the conclusion to this year's saga...

Continue reading "He's Got Legs"

Posted by jackdas at 4:32 PM | Comments (6) | TrackBack

September 12, 2005

"So, Neil, how do your legs feel?"

I think they feel more like they have been beaten with the flat side. Yeah, think deep bruising.

But I am alive and very well. So, thank you for any prayers offered.

More to come...

Posted by jackdas at 9:11 PM | TrackBack

September 9, 2005

And I'm Off...

How?
Well, just a little bit in lots of ways, but this is intended to be a short post.

When?
This evening.

Where?
To do the MS 150 in Columbia, Missouri over the next two days and to try to ride at least 175 miles in the next two days. Maybe more? If you are so inclined, please pray for safety for all us riders and the volunteers in traffic and in the heat.

And since my sponsors topped $1000, I will be wearing the sign below. If you still want to join the sponsoring fun, there is a wee link called "click" to the right there. ------------>

Posted by jackdas at 3:35 PM | TrackBack

July 14, 2005

I would walk 500 miles...

Well, after a long hiatus, I am back, at least for the evening. I could go into a lengthy discourse of why it is I blog and why it is that that motivation seems to go away for long streches and then come back, but I won't. In short, I blog to express creativity and to connect with people. And one of the people who I always enjoy to connect with is David, and the fact that he has created a blog, I suppose is some of the motivation for me to pick mine up again.

I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with weddings. Actually, it is more love and avoidance due to disappointment. I don't think I have ever really hated them, just there have been times when I have been too sore to go to optional ones and too sore to relish the ones I have had to or needed to attended through obligation or love for the participants. And it isn't just weddings. I am deeply moved by baptisms, especially of wiggly, often wailing, wee ones, communion, and yes even funerals.

Only communion and baptism get the sacramental tag in Presbyterianism, but the others get it in Catholicism, well not funerals, but you gotta have Extreme Unction to get to a funeral. Without getting into theology, these all, specifically for believers, can be demonstrations of God's grace, yes they are even mediator of God's grace and blessing to us. That, I think, is why I dig them theologically. Emotionally I think I respond to the vows of commitment, the move toward connection of people, or the severing of that connection (or the establishment of new connection to Christ) in death.

I remember the first wedding that made an impression upon me at these two levels. It was the wedding of Allan and Diane, two InterVarsity staff workers. My brother I attended and afterward talked in the car of how much we liked it. The two main appealing features? Corporate hymn singing by the entire congregation and an honest to goodness sermon where the couple sat down to listen. It was like a church service with a wedding appended. Very nice. Plus, Diane and Allan were two fantastic people and it was just delightful and blessed to see them wed. I don't know, but I think at that time I began to desire marriage and relish the prospect of a wedding.

I will not say much here about what made the attendance of weddings an occassion of sadness, but here it is in short. It is logical enough, I suppose, that people who fail at intense relationships to which they have committed a great deal are either completely soured or saddened by weddings. In my relationship, weddings themselves were one of the bones of contention (one of a virtual skeleton of bones), precipitating intense emotional arguments. In short, I pushed for tradition; she did not care a hoot for tradition or being the center of attention, but only that loved ones were there and that it got one married. Looking back now, I think I cared not so much for tradition, though some of them are dear, but of meeting expectations. I think that on this score she won the argument. Really, though, if I ever am to wed, I think I will attempt to develop, to what many men comes naturally, an apathy for details.

Still, there are these thoughts. I think simple is good. Not cheap, mind you. High aesthetics in frugal fashion. And, if the focus is really on why we are there and who has brought us there and on family and friends, then I think I'll be content. Hey, I think I would even like to nix the gifts or channel them to some greater good (not my idea, but a good one). O, and just this one thing more, I want a processional for the guys...

When I wake up yeah I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the man who wakes up next to you
When I go out yeah I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the man who goes along with you

If I get drunk yes I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the man who gets drunk next to you
And if I haver yeah I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the man who's havering to you

But I would walk 500 miles
And I would walk 500 more
Just to be the man who walked 1000 miles
To fall down at your door

When I'm working yes I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the man who's working hard for you
And when the money comes in for the work I'll do
I'll pass almost every penny on to you

When I come home yeah I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the man who comes back home to you
And if I grow old well I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the man who's growing old with you

But I would walk 500 miles
And I would walk 500 more
Just to be the man who walked 1000 miles
To fall down at your door

When I'm lonely yes I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the man whose lonely without you
When I'm dreaming yes I know I'm gonna dream
Dream about the time when I'm with you.

But I would walk 500 miles
And I would walk 500 more
Just to be the man who walked 1000 miles
To fall down at your door

Seriously, I do, but I doubt I'll get it.

Posted by jackdas at 7:58 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

March 15, 2005

Curses!! Foiled Again!!!

OK, I don't think that this was because I took off work yesterday, as everyone in the library swears that they have no part in these attacks. My male coworkers made light of a Secret Pal Society comprised exclusively of women and they have subsequently targeted all the males in the library. One office was decorated in bubble wrap and toilet paper in honor of Bubble Wrap and Thomas Crapper days. Next, the director's office was decorated with numerous pictures of ballerinas and rose petals. Mine was done as you see below with individual books and a soda cup and lamps and pens wrapped in aluminum foil (aluminium for the Brits).

Of all the sundry signs they put up, this one I am going to keep as a good reminder.

So if life hands you tin foil...I figure you make a giant arch. I went to the Gateway Arch with some visiting friends yesterday and so it was fresh in the mind. Oh, and with left over foil? A giant Ball O' Aluminum.

Posted by jackdas at 4:32 PM

March 3, 2005

Recipe-Fru Fru Berry Mango Compote for a Baked Brie

OK, so I am not as fru fru as this post might indicate. But it was the Oscars and the roomies were putting on a wine and cheesish affair, and so I thought I would rise to the occassion. Plus, I like to think I have a good mind for cooking and brie is one of the snobbish types of cheeses I really do enjoy. So without further adieu, here is a recipe for a compote for a baked brie.

I am not certain about the amounts, but just experiment. Ingredients can be all added in the beginning or save part of the fruit for adding later if you want some chunkier bits.

*8 oz. box of strawberrys, chopped in small pieces
*4 oz? box of blueberrys
*1/4 of a mango, an excellent way to get mango for cooking or eating is to slice off one side close to the seed and then take the resultant oval and score the firm yellow meat of the mango in a checkerboard pattern all the way down to the skin, and then push up from the skin side so that you should have something that looks like a yellow, blocky hedgehog, allowing one to easily cut off cubes of the divine fruit that is the mango. Oh yeah, and get a ripe mango. It should be pretty firm but not tight. The meat should be bright yellow/orange and not pasty white.
*water
*sugar to taste, you should test this throughout the cooking process
*red wine
*1/8 teaspoon of freshly and finely chopped ginger. I am in two minds about this addition, but it did give a nice zesty little bite. Not too much, though, or you will not like the bite at all.
*a little Promise margarine at the end, butter would work too. Not so much so as to make it greasy, but just a little to give it a pie-ish flavor
*salt to tast, you should not need much, but more if you don't add the butter. Hey, it gives flavor. No matter if my friend Becky denies this and persists in baking saltless cookies. Her husband Kenn agrees with me, but then again he is a husband and so he supports her by eating her excellent, though saltless cookies. And for matter, I do too.

Let all this simmer and simmer until it reaches a compotish conistency and put it on your baking brie. A woman in my bible study noted that this would be even better with a brie in a pastry crust. Alas, that pastry business does exceed my culinary skills. At least as they currently stand.

Posted by jackdas at 6:56 PM | Comments (1)

January 19, 2005

Silly Songs with Neil

OK, this may be approaching the bottom of the barrel, but here is a product of a period of time when I was a rather too eager Ebay user (buyer not seller) and was also trying to write some song lyrics. I don't even know which of my imaginary bands could even record this masterwork. My friend Jeremy did actually make some music for this, but, alas, we have been too busy to get into the studio. You know, touring and all that.

Ebayland

Verse 1
IÕm clicking through this online store
IÕve got all I need but I want more
A CD burner would be nice
If the bidding stops at a decent price
But I canÕt wait. Hey, I know how
IÕll shell out my clams with Buy it Now.
Now Paypal, heÕs a friend of mine
He cuts the crazy waiting time
I used to wait while checks would clear
So, ship it now! I want it here!

Chorus
Yeah, IÕm living large in Ebayland
Now, there ainÕt no milk and honey
But who needs that when deals are good
And you can always borrow money.

Verse 2
I need some Reeboks in size eight.
So I can lose a lot of weight
Some super-metabolic-burner
So I can be a head turner.
But better still, I have a plan
More suited to an online man
I know they say that True Love Waits,
But if I just could bid on a mate
SheÕd be here soon, IÕve got Paypal
And I could wed my Ebay Gal.

Chorus

Verse 3

Now IÕm only joking. No, really
An Ebay bride? ThatÕs just silly.
But I can still renew my quest
Get more stuff to make life the best
You know my cable modemÕs smokinÕ
So I wonÕt ever be left out hopinÕ
I coulda, shoulda won the bid
Beaten by some technokid.
And if I am, well, what the hey!
There more stuff listed everyday

Chorus

Verse 4
ItÕs crazy, though, with all this stuff.
YouÕd think that I would have enough.
To fill this empty gaping hole
That is the center of my soul.
But with each new delivery truck
Its never closer to being filled up
And Paypal could not ever store
The price to make the payment for
The Thing to fill its odd-Shaped space.
And Ebay cannot list His grace.

Second Chorus
So get me out of Ebayland.
I want some milk and honey
The deal you make to me is good.
And, I canÕt touch it with my money.

Posted by jackdas at 2:05 PM | Comments (1)

January 4, 2005

Seven Stars over U City

Last Thursday saw the third of my Lord of the Rings parties. A borrowed data projector and the sound being pumped through a sound system with much base made the experience quite visceral. The room was almost shaking as Frodo stood over the Crack of Doom. I think the neighbors were away. Or at least I very much hope so.

It was not quite a feast fit for a King, although true Kings have been known to grace far more meager repasts.

On the menu? "Pheasant from the vales of the Anduin" ably played by a small Honeysuckle Turkey, "Olives from South Ithilien," "A Shortcut to Mushrooms," and other delectables. The sign above, illustrates a small bone I might pick with Tolkien. His portrayals of the darker skinned leave something to be desired. I do not believe they are maliciously wicked, but neither perhaps are they the complete truth about the world. So, here is my dish that imagines that perhaps Strider in his travels in the South picked up some southern spices to flavor his wild rabbit. Who knows perhaps he met the odd Emeth or two also.

At the end of the evening it was time for pipeweed, a tradition which all the peoples of Middle Earth enjoy together. And so...

Elf (although an uncommonly shabbily dressed one) and....

Dwarf (although an uncommonly good looking one) and...

Hobbit (although an uncommonly brownish one) each raised a pipe together to celebrate the return of the King.

Finally, a picture from a journey up the river road which I think has a rather Middle Earthish feel to it. Perhaps, it is of the the bleakness after the last leaves have fallen off the Mallorns.

Posted by jackdas at 5:53 PM

December 10, 2004

Getting Fitted for the Feast

Last night I laid down another $100 or so for the honor of standing up with a friend as he is wed. And it is, indeed, an honor. As for the $100 bucks and the rest of our extravagant American nuptial practice, that must wait for another post. Suffice it to say that between being a best man(this makes the fourth time, and what is that saying...4 times a best man, never a...oh, my mistake, that's with the bridesmaids), and the third or fourth time as groomsman (I am too lazy to count), and also numerous times "ushing," I have spent enough on rented formal wear and fake shoes to put a child through a semester of college (assuming its a state school and with compounding interest).

No, what I was reflecting on last night as I was being fitted was the politeness of the people who measure you and the wonder of a Tuxedo. Think about it. They see all shapes and sizes of folks, good looking and not, and yet, in my experience at least, they are always invariably polite, as they gently guide you through the ignominy of being measured. And I imagine it is ignominious for most men, at least at some level, unless you are Hugh Jackman or Ewan McGregor or Clive Owen or whoever is to be the next Bond and will wear Tuxedos for a living. These tuxedo measurers, though, never say, "Hey, bub, keep it up and next time you might need to bring your own tape measure. Yeah, the round one with the little metal dealy on it. Yeah, from the hardware store."

Also, Tuxedo's are pretty sharp and provide a pretty good sermon illustration. Leaving aside all the fuss and expense and bother (remember, that is for another post...maybe), they make anyone look good, look sharp even. Of course, there are those who can make them look really good, ala "Bond, James Bond," but even for those of us whose wardrobe has been, at times, their entire room i.e. every invisible inch floor space, it makes us clean up pretty good. And, that is, indeed, their point, to make somewhat glorious, the not so glorious.

Scripture does not talk about what a bridegroom's friends would wear, although I imagine it was several steps above daily wear, but it does talk about what the guests at a wedding wear. They wear a robe that is given to them by the host. And if they happen to neglect to put it on, they don't get to come to the party. No, worse yet, they get thrown out into the darkness.

Now, that robe I imagine is like nothing you've ever seen. It would likely seem so simple, that the extravagantly dressed would grumble at having to put it on. Most of the poor, though, would gladly give up their rags and slip it on. All, would eventually find that it was the finest thing that they had ever worn. And, halfway through the feast, as the really good wine was being brought out, they would look up at their Glorious Host and realize they had on the very same thing. And, oh they all just looked so fine!

Now, for some truly good descriptions of clothes describing glory, go read some C. S. Lewis. Yeah, and my wedding? It's either thrift store splendour or kilts (as if I could ever be so lucky and be permitted such). Or, maybe kilts from thrift stores. Nah, I never seen a man's one in any thrift store, and believe me I have been looking.

Posted by jackdas at 1:12 PM | Comments (1)

December 6, 2004

Broken Poem

OK, perhaps this will be a recurring segment like "Photo Bonus" is for random pictures and "Stereotyping" might become for making sweeping, generalizing statements, which have the preemptive cover of being labelled "Stereotyping."

At any rate, if this segment flies, I will include a poem that just doesn't work either in my mind or because someone else (my one poetry teacher or an honest friend) has told me so. You might be thinking, "Hey, I can think of some of your past posts to which you might consider applying this label to retroactively." Indeed, that is likely true. Perhaps, every poem post could be a titled such.

For "Broken Poem" posts, though, or for any poem post for that matter, if you want to post suggestions to help "fix the poem," that would be kind of cool. Assuming there is a collective "you" out there that actutally read these things.
________________________

This poem uses parts and speech and islands breaking off from mainlands as symbols for people, which is all rather abstract, so that might be why it does not work. It is part of a longer "Journey" poem. I did change the word to "subjects" in the first line from "phrases," and stanzas 1 and 4 and 2 and 3 are paired. And, I like adding "to you" at the end of line 13, but perhaps that is too juvenileish. Why bother fixing this. I think it has some nice images and lines.

(title) lambert international

1 a thousand subjects out of context
2 sit in these padded chairs
3 dreaming of verbs
4 to be and do

5 a thousand islands float
6 detached from mainlands
7 forming these strange archipelagos
8 these strange bays and headlands

9 and soon
10 i too will float
11 severed
12 trailing a muddy wake
13 streaming back
14 diffusing with the distance
15 into clear blue

16 soon i too
17 ripped from my context
18 will struggle just
19 to be
20 bleeding my dependencies

Posted by jackdas at 4:48 PM | Comments (2)

October 16, 2004

Band Names I Would Use

I don't know if any of you out there spend any time coming up with band names. I am intrigued by band names, wondering how band members come upon their names. Does the name have a meaning? Or is it just some slick postmodern trick? Or some exercise in Dadaism? And, yet, even as I have been alternately scornful of and delighted by band names from afar, I have been devising my own list of Band Names I Would Use.

Now, it is very unlikely that I will ever have a band of my own upon which to bestow a name, but it is good to be prepared. And, I'm not greedy. With the exception of the first band name, I am willing to give the rights away to these fabulous appellations..for a mention in the liner notes,of course.

The Dead Cicadas-Initially this name was meant to mock nihilistic bands. Now it would be a band that reflects on the sorrow often present in life and relationships and their seeming meaninglessness at times, but still reflects trust in God. One day the The Dead Cicadas are going to produce a web site, when their first album is in the can. A cicada can spend up to 17 years in the ground and then have to crawl up a tree in exoskeleton, do a exerting, slow-motion back flip out of it, and then try to mate and die before a couple of days go by. And, still they sing.

The Living Ingrates -Playing off the Grateful Dead, and reflecting our individual and our society's ingratitude towards God, which is so often the case, when, truly, we have so much. This would just have to be a punk band. See, sample lyrics below.

Search Your Feelings Luke-From Star Wars, of course, and meant to mock/shame our society's and my own veneration/worship of feelings. OK, so this one is a little esoteric. Just for a challenge, each of their songs should have a clear Star Wars allusion.

Platonic Hayride-Sillier than the rest, if that is possible, but just a funny concept. A band dedicated to describing the simple pleasures in life.

A verse from The Living Ingrates song "One Must Have Bread to Whine"

I live my life unfeeling
True pain or poverty.
I've got some scars need healing
But know no hunger pains.
I've got some wounds I'm licking
But still have hands to raise,
To slap down my whining
And try a little praise.

And, so...keep you eyes open for the occassional lyric from one of the house bands. All ages. No cover.

Posted by jackdas at 1:29 AM