Neil-
Thanks for your post. I see Jesus going through quite a bit of sadness during his time on earth, esp. with the death of Lazarus and then weeping over Jerusalem to name a few. He is real about his sadness yet he is ultimately not in despair. There is some balance there I haven't found-being genuine when I’m feeling sad and yet not giving into despair because of my hope in the Lord. I'd love to read your Bible study once it’s complete.

Neil- a cogitive-psycho-spiritual approach to sadness: What underlying beliefs drive this emotion? If sadness turns into despair it is likely because we disbelieve that God is good, or that he cares. This is sin, and should be repented of (but God is infinitely gracious and certainly can transform us even in the midst of despair).

Godly sorrow will always lead us back to God- so we can weep and cry out to him. I think there may be times that God weeps with us over the state of things. I think it is when we presume that God is no longer interested in our hearts, or when we lack the faith to cry out to God (and then proceed to "soothe" our spirits with our own methods-idolatry) that we begin to sin in our sadness.

i don't really know much about this topic either, but what does strike me is how far we go to try to avoid strong emotions as if they were somehow inherently evil. think of jeremiah and his laments...the guy was a total kook, but he was doing the exactly the mission God had created him for. and his sadness lasted a long time. also, the whole idea of renting your clothes, sackcloth and ashes, wailing. when was the last time any of us wailed without being really far in the woods and alone? why do we get so embarrassed and repress these very human emotions?

personally, i think we do not know very well how to grieve. we don't like to feel those emotions so we gloss over them, shut them out, and try to move as quickly as possible past the event.

Neil,
I have been thinking about sadness lately too, and--like Tanya--would really like to read what you learn. I think Ange is right about our cultural tendencies to see strong emotional responses, namely grief, as bad. Often I’ve seen, strong mourning (not to be confused with despair) being equated with or blamed on a loss of faith. That’s sad! I think it’s good to look to how Jesus dealt with grief. He wept when Lazarus died...Was his response wrong or sinful? He knew that HE, God could heal him, so why the tears? Surely he didn’t loose sight of truth.

That said, I must admit that I have always admired people that can keep composed. I have been really annoyed that I haven’t been able to make it through one day composed since I got back from visiting my family. I feel like I appear unstable; tearing up when people mention my mom or sister, scowling when people ask me how work’s going or other sensitive topics. All this to say UGH it’s so hard to block out cultural shamings, but would rather “look” nuts if I’m growing in the process.

“The world is not respectable; it is mortal, tormented, confused, deluded forever; but it is shot through with glints of courage and laughter; and in these, the spirit blooms timidly, and struggles to the light amid the thorns.”
~George Santayana.